


Lunch (the Reprises)

by orphan_account



Category: In the Flesh (TV)
Genre: Canon Typical Violence, Fluff, Gary is the worst, Homophobic language in chapter 3, M/M, Protective!Simon, Some angst, Some hurt/comfort, some description of a panic attack in chapter two
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-20
Updated: 2014-08-21
Packaged: 2018-02-14 02:21:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2174379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From a prompt from Tinq. Different ways the lunch scene could've played out</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Tinq](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tinq/gifts).



Kieren hadn’t actually thought Simon was going to do this, when he’d blurted it out he’d been prepared for a no, Hell for another argument, because this was asking way too much. And yet here they were. With Simon, Simon who had berated him for hiding under contacts and coverup, Simon the big bad twelfth disciple of the Undead Prophet, shifting nervously next to Kieren while he made small talk with his parents. 

It was surreal, but it was also, well it was also kind of nice. It was awkward, and tense, with his parents staring at Simon, and they were definitely trying to decide whether or not the two of them were together, which had to be an interesting job for them since Kieren didn’t really know himself yet. And Simon, as hard as he was trying (and Kieren could appreciate that he was trying really hard) was not helping the situation with his awkward glances and accidental innuendos. Kieren was definitely going to have to give him a hard time about that later. 

But, here he was, having a nice, if inedible, lunch with his parents and his date (boyfriend?), who apparently was actually just a giant sweater wearing dork under his menacing cult leader persona (somehow this didn’t surprise Kieren at all). They were smiling and making awkward small talk, and it was all startlingly domestic. 

Then Jem showed up at the door, and of course she’d brought fucking Gary along. Seeing his sister with that wanker was enough to ruin his day all on it’s own, but Gary in the room with Simon for any extended amount of time was a recipe for disaster and Kieren knew it. 

His parents left the room for a moment and Kieren watched a little nervously as Simon leaned across the table to Gary “Shall we keep it cool guys. While we’re here?” 

And oh, that wasn’t what Kieren had been expecting. Simon was being nice, fuck Simon was being _great,_ but there were limits. This was beginning to reach Kieren’s already, but here was Simon, actually trying to keep the peace. And he was doing it for Kieren. 

“No problem this end pal” 

Maybe this could actually work. It would be painfully awkward certainly, for all of them, but…. maybe. And then, after a couple of minutes of uncomfortable conversation, during which Kieren shot a glance at Simon every few seconds, trying to say “Thank you” and “I’m sorry” and “Please don’t say anything in front of my folks I promise once we’re out of here I’ll never make you do this again”, his mum just had to mention the rising. 

Simon, somehow, was still keeping his cool. He even stepped in himself, smiling and joking “You’ll have to watch your step then”, and god Kieren wanted to kiss him right there. 

Gary, it seemed, was not so invested in making things work. “Have one for that time in Kitson’s place, remember that?” 

Jem snorted, covering her mouth with one hand and ducking her head to hide her laughter, but her face was a little apologetic when she glanced back up at Kieren. 

If Gary’d stopped there, things still might’ve been all right, but no, he kept going. And going. Kieren could practically feel Simon bristling beside him as  Gary went on about killing a rabid. 

Jem shifted uncomfortably in her seat “Gar-“ she started, voice small, but Gary cut her off with a hand and kept going.

“Second one, top of the neck. But fat lad’s still coming at me. Me with me trusty toothbrush” 

“Gary!” Jem again, louder this time, and actually sounding kind of pissed. Kieren took a second to be grateful for his sister taking in his side, even in such a small way. 

“One second. She walks up to him: gun jams. I’m like, ‘Oh right, okay, good night Saigon’ Cool as you like she pulls down the shower pole. Pum. Through the eyehole” 

Kieren shot a glance at Simon, who was sat rigidly in his chair, teeth gritted and still doing his best to look calm. _Just hang on another minute_. Kieren though desperately. _He’ll shut up in a second just please hang on another minute._

But as Gary continued Kieren found he didn’t care much whether Simon kept his cool or not “Wait that’s not it! This Rabid-“ Gary turned and locked eyes directly with Simon “this _PDS sufferer-_ goes over like that” He leaned to one side in a slow keeling motion and Kieren thought he was going to be sick, or possibly scream “Only the pole’s still stuck in its head. Hits me on the way down. I lose my balance, don’t I. Both feet in toilet bowl! Boots wet, socks wet.” 

The table was quiet, Jem’s looking down at her food, and Kieren could see out of the corner of his eye that by some miracle Simon was still holding himself back. Gary looked around, and he looked almost surprised that Jem hasn’t laughed with him. No, more annoyed than surprised actually. Kieren was about to say something, had his response already and rising up in his throat when Gary started up again. His tone was lower this time, still jovial, but more threatening now. “See, think that’s what we ought to do to the lot of them. Rotter’s a rotter. Drugs or no drugs.” And then he locked eyes with Kieren across the table, and his expression was so very clearly the same one he had worn when he took Freddie off to the treatment center. _What are you going to do to stop me?_ “Isn’t that right, _Ren_?”

The use of the nickname caught Kieren so completely off guard that for a moment his response went out of his head. He almost had it back, when he caught the movement out of the corner of his eye and Gary’s chair, with Gary still in it, toppled backward onto the ground. Simon was standing over him, looking both satisfied and guilty at the same time. Everyone at the table stood up, Jem, a little reluctantly, going over to help Gary disentangle himself from the table and chair, and Kieren’s parents looking between Simon and Kieren as if they weren’t entirely sure how to react. 

“Sorry, I uh-“ Simon stammered, glancing at Kieren and then at his parents and taking an uncomfortable step away from where Gary was still trying to get off the floor. 

“You don’t need to apologize” Kieren said quietly. His dad looked like he wanted to say something to the contrary, but Kieren wasn’t having it, not right then. He grabbed Simon by the wrist and pulls him out of the house, Simon stammering a couple of uncomfortable goodbyes and apologies on their way. 

Once outside, Kieren leaned back against the wall of his house, dropping his head into his hands. “Christ that was-“ He looked up at Simon “I’m sorry. I swear I didn’t know it was going to be like that” 

Simon shook his head “I shouldn’t have hit him. Not in front of your folks, at least.” He paused, “Guess I failed the test, huh?” and he’s trying to make it sound like a joke, but he looked so vulnerable and nervous that Kieren instantly felt another rush of guilt. 

He straightened up, leaning toward Simon “No” He kissed him quickly, pulling away and smiling at the slightly stunned look on Simon’s face “You were wonderful” 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter features some description of the beginnings of an anxiety/panic attack.

It’s actually surprisingly easy to stay quiet once Gary starts up. Simon knows when he’s being provoked, and while he’s happy, thrilled even, to rise to the challenge in a pub or at the give back scheme, he also knows how to pick his battles. As satisfying as it would be, taking Gary on here would do nothing but upset Kieren’s family, and probably Kieren too. And since Kieren’s the point of this whole ridiculous exercise, proving to Kieren that this is something he can do, that he can be something other than the disciple from time to time, it’s not something he wants to do. 

Never mind that, a few months ago, the very idea that he would do any of this, hold polite conversation with the living, or put that vile stuff on his face again, or go on a fucking _date,_ let alone be brought home to meet someone’s family, would’ve been insane. Since then he’s met Kieren, and Kieren makes things… different. He makes Simon different. Which is a tangle of worries and confusion that he can sort out another time, because right now, and it’s starting to seem almost all of the time, he’s more worried about Kieren. 

The blonde boy is staring daggers at Gary as he finishes his ‘funny story’. For a moment it seems he’s finally done, but then he picks up again, still grinning, still staring at Simon and Kieren in turn “Wait that’s not it! This Rabid-this _PDS sufferer-“_ And this is definitely aimed at Simon, who takes extra care to school his face, just raising an eyebrow in response _“_ goes over like that. Only the pole’s still stuck in its head. Hits me on the way down. I lose my balance, don’t I. Both feet in toilet bowl! Boots wet, socks wet.”

There is no laughter. Everyone at the table, even Kieren’s little sister, looks uncomfortable, and relieved that the story has finally come to an end. The exception is Kieren, who is practically radiating barely contained rage. 

“That what you did in the war, is it? Killed people?” 

Kieren’s shaking a little, and Simon’s positive this is the most upset he’s ever seen him. He thinks that this should feel like a good thing, Kieren’s finally going to stand up for himself, going to denounce the lies his family and his community have been forcing on him. And if this had been any other undead, Simon would have cheered them on. But this is Kieren, and this is Kieren’s family, and of course things are different with Kieren. This doesn’t feel like a good thing, because Simon does not want to watch Kieren come apart at the seams, does not want to make him deal with the fall out. 

He leans toward Kieren, says in hushed tones “Leave it” because he wants Kieren to know that he does not have to do this for Simon. That he is still all right with sitting through this lunch, and trying to make a good impression until they can get out of here. 

But Kieren shakes him off “No I won’t.” He turns to Gary “Same here. I killed people too. I have a funny story of my own actually. I rose from the dead” his voice breaks a little “and I ripped people apart” 

Simon ducks his head,  not looking at anyone. Part of him wants to reach out to Kieren, to offer comfort or support, but he also doesn’t want to ruin this even more, doesn’t want to put himself in a position where Kieren’s parents will hate him, because their relationship, if that’s even what it is, is just beginning and Simon is so afraid of doing anything that will put distance between them. 

So he sits quietly, and listens while Kieren continues “Okay maybe it’s not that funny, but you can sit there and listen to it anyway. Like we did with you”

“Kieren don’t” 

“Nah” Gary sits forward a little, shooting a glance at Kieren’s sister “You’re alright”

“Listen to the story” Kieren snaps, and Simon would be proud of him, is a little bit proud and amazed at how fierce this boy can be, except that Kieren’s still breathing too quickly, still looks like he’s coming unhinged.  “It’s weird at first, because all there is is just darkness. It’s so dark it doesn’t make any difference if your eyes are open or closed. What you think is that you’ve been buried alive” 

“Kieren please”

Kieren barrels right over his dad, just keeps going, eyes still aimed at Gary but not really there anymore, glazing over a little. “Not ideal. That’s proper… panic, you know” And it certainly looks like panic now, he’s breathing faster still, and when Simon hides his eyes from the table yet again he sees the jerky nervous pattern Kieren’s hands are making on his leg. “You hit out at the lid of the coffin even though there’s no way. There’s no way. And you’re just down there, in the dark with the-“

This is the point when Simon makes the connection. He’s not unfamiliar with panic attacks, had several of his own back at the commune, usually after flashbacks, Amy helped him through one right here in Roarton after a particularly bad nightmare. But this is the point when he realizes Kieren’s not going to be able to walk it back anymore. 

He sees very easily how badly this situation is going to go, with Steve and Sue shifting uncomfortably in their seats, Kieren’s sister looking at him with an even mixture of concern and fear, and Gary leaning forward, just waiting for Kieren to give him something he can use. 

Kieren’s talking about digging through the dirt now. He’s shaking, Simon can feel the place where the leg of his chair is jiggling against the ground, and Simon does not want to watch this. He reaches out, let’s his arm connect with the untouched glass poised at the edge of the table in a move that barely looks accidental, and lets it fall. 

“Shit” he says, and tries to make it sound surprised. Kieren’s still talking for a moment after the glass shatters but he pauses, looks at it, eyes wide and still breathing too fast. 

“I’ll get a towel” Sue says, but Simon shakes his head quickly. 

“It’s alright. I’ll do it. Kier, could you show me where it is?” 

Kieren blinks at him, looking both shocked and annoyed “I’m trying to-“

“It’ll just take a minute.” Kieren’s still staring at him. He knows Simon knocked over the glass on purpose, he’s annoyed and frustrated, and Simon’s really hoping he hasn’t made a mistake here. 

Kieren gets up, slowly, and walks him into the kitchen, but before he can point him towards the cabinet, Simon steps up to him, puts his hands on Kieren’s shoulders “You need to calm down in there” It’s a useless thing to say, and Simon knows it, but he needs to stall for time, needs to give Kieren a minute, need to do _something,_ other than watch a disaster unfold. 

“How can you say that? How can _you_ say that? Did you hear the way he was talking? What, they get to sit there and make jokes about killing us, but I say _one thing_ and-“

“That’s not what I meant-“ Simon raises his hands in surrender, attempting to placate him “You know that’s not what I meant, but Kieren-“

“No. It’s not fair” Kieren shakes hie head, “It’s not fair that he gets to do that. That, my _family_ lets him do that. I’m not letting him get away with it.” 

Kieren looks like he’s going to start crying now, and Simon thinks, okay, better in here with me than out there. “Of course not. I don’t think he should get away with it either. But later, not in front of your family” 

“Yes, in front of my family!” Kieren’s voice is shaking again, borderline sobbing, “That’s the problem, isn’t it? In front of my family! They’re letting him sit there and tell ‘funny stories’ about killing people like us. Do they not- Does nobody-“

Simon keeps his hold on Kieren’s shoulders, tugs him down so that they’re sitting face to face. He wants to pull him in now, wants to kiss the panic off his features, but instead he sits back for a moment, let’s Kieren talk, getting more emotional and less coherent as he continues, because he knows Kieren needs to run through this.

Halfway through his speech, Kieren starts to sob, that awful, dry, no relief version of sobbing that they have, and Simon reaches out to pull him in closer. Kieren tangles his arms around Simon’s neck and fits himself against his chest, burying his face in the fabric of Simon’s shirt. 

Simon lifts a hand, gently cards his fingers through the small mess of strawberry blonde hair. He sits there like that for a long time, murmuring varied iterations of the same “I know. It’ll be okay,” and thinking that, despite everything that happened today, this is a miracle, that he gets to be here, holding this boy. 

Eventually, the door creaks open and Kieren jumps back from Simon as his sister peeks her head through. “Gary’s left” She says quietly “I- I asked him to leave, so…” She doesn’t sound sure how she feels about this, just closes the door again and leaves them to themselves.

Kieren glances at Simon, scrubbing a hand over his eyes in memory of the tears that might’ve needed to be dried there. “I guess we should go back out” he says, calmer now.

“Your folks might start to wonder what we’re doing in here” Simon agrees

Kieren snorts “Well, since you _liked the way I gave back”_

Simon groans, buries his head in his hands until he feels Kieren tap his shoulder, and then gets up with him. Kieren pauses just in front of the door, glances at him, and then grabs Simon’s hand as they go out. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter features one instance of homophobic language

Kieren Walker is the first risen. Of course he is, really Simon’s not sure how he could’ve ever thought it was anyone else. Of course the first is this beautiful boy, still ranting, with no idea what he’s just revealed. 

“It’s what being born must be like. Except you’ve got context. Because honestly, dead... ”

Simon doesn’t deserve him. Simon didn’t deserve him when he was just Kieren, but now that he’s… He’s the first risen. He’s their savior. He’s a miracle. 

Simon can’t want him. That’s out of the question. Can’t have a.. relationship. Can’t fight with him and ask things from him and need him. 

“Everything up to then was fear. Everything, even when I was alive, different levels of fear. But then it’s gone.”

But Kieren will need a guardian, a right hand. Simon doesn’t know, not really, what the role of the first will be in the second rising, but he knows they will be important. Kieren will be—is—vital. And surely, whatever he has to do there will be some place for Simon at his side. 

There is no place now for him selfishly wanting Kieren, for dates or lunches or further kisses, but, he reminds himself, has to remind himself to keep this realization from shaking him apart, he does not have to lose Kieren all together.

Simon had always known that he would love their savior. They all will. But it can not be the kind of love he feels himself hurtling towards every minute that he spends in Kieren’s presence. 

Kieren will understand, maybe it will take him a while, Simon knows he does not believe in the teachings of the prophet, but he can’t overlook something so great as this. 

He is going to save them all, and Simon is going to be right beside him. 

Steve smacks his hand against the table “That’s enough! Do you hear me? I will not have it.”

“What did I cross the line Dad?” Kieren’s voice is shaky, filled with rage. 

“Kieren please” 

“After they get to high five each other about killing us, like it’s a big joke. Everyone’s fine with that. You’ll put up with that. But-“ 

“Kieren,” his mother again “can we please just stop this? Let’s just have a nice lunch-“

“That’s all I wanted!” Kieren snaps “I wanted a nice lunch.  With my parents, and my sister,” he stares daggers at Jem, who shifts a little uncomfortably under his gaze “and my goddamn date.” Gary snickers slightly, and Kieren’s focused is locked on him again “Yes, my fucking date, Gary. What you want to call me a fag again? Didn’t get your fill of that in highschool? Go on, then.” And then Simon’s being tugged up a little, and he makes a shocked noise as Kieren kisses him. It’s not particularly a nice kiss, barely even a kiss, really, more of a very pointed statement. Kieren’s done hiding. Period. 

Simon stays there, frozen half in his chair and half out of it while Kieren turns his rant back to his parents. 

“Years of living in this house, and how many times have you stopped me saying something because it’s not _decent?_ I don’t care if it’s decent. I don’t care! Things aren’t decent. How can you not- How can you expect-“ He stops, shakes his head “Forget it. Come on, Simon” 

Simon doesn’t hear him, is still awestruck and head spun, is still wanting to kiss Kieren again and absolutely terrified of that possibility. 

“Let’s go, Simon!” Kieren repeats, and this time Simon hears him. Gets up and follows him out the door, follows him back to the bungalow, where Kieren takes off their coverup with gentle hands and then pushes Simon back against the wall as he kisses him. 

And Simon lets it happen, because he is selfish and involved and he can not deny this beautiful boy anything. 

**Author's Note:**

> Obviously, neither the characters or the lines taken from the script belong to me. If they did there would probably be more kissing on screen. I don't have any current plans to add additional chapters, but I will if I get any more ideas (or Tinq throws more prompts my way, which is very likely). Thanks for reading, feedback is appreciated!


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